Now I’m overcome by the light of day.
Some what of an Epiphany occurred to me in the early hours of the morning, as I sat still being fully aware of the textures against my back, under my curled up legs, and in the air around me.
The amount of times I aspire to do something “I want to learn clarinet, I need to learn french, I want to do my exhibition”, and all this time passes, and I still haven’t achieved a peak of any of these things.
Which is just fucking lame.
And suddenly I realized how over it I am.
I’ve made an agreement with myself that once finally finding my home here, I will begin paying off my loan, and then firstly begin with my french classes.
Piece by piece, I will finally achieve all these things that feel so beautiful to dream about, and finally can start feeling beautiful practicing them in my life and growing into whoever I end up being within the year.
I’m ashamed I didn’t discover this attitude sooner in my life, but I’m grateful I have been touched with it now.
And don’t worry Tristan, Playing and learning bass was never in question.
And so it begins.
